Tuesday 280513: Day 01 without helper and husband with me.

It’s just me and Matthew today, the whole day for 14 hours, from 7am to 9pm. Our helper has gone home, and Augz went back to work after a day off yesterday to settle our house reno.

Thank God for my in-laws’ helper to cook Matt’s meals and do the housework.

This is possibly the worst time to be without help – cos we’re right smack in the middle of house moving. In fact, we’re moving the coming Monday (woot woot! hurray hurray!!!). I’m packing everyday, but where I used to be able to pack the entire flat in one day by myself, I now take a whole lot more time to pack one room’s worth of things. As is clearly shown in the pic, the packing process is much hampered by the more curious of our two cats, Maya, who enjoys getting into every single box… and of course, Matthew, who helps by unpacking what Mummy packs.

Still, I have faith we will scrap by.

I wish we can be moving into a house that’s all ready for us but we’re sort of doing it the other way round, especially since a lot of our furniture will only be arriving in end June. It took us many rounds of discussions but finally, we decided this is for the best. In fact, it is my dear husband’s decision to move on Monday, and to a large extent, I am grateful, even as I know things might be tough in the beginning without help at home. Just Matt and I, with plenty of unpacking to do!

I can’t wait though.

Cos honestly, it isn’t easy to take care of Matthew here at my in-laws’, simply because we didn’t equip the house to be child-friendly. In between split-level living room, glass table, metal railings and the fact that our bedroom is on the second floor, what this means is I don’t have a single moment of rest. Everywhere Matt runs, I have to follow because of the damn steps from the split-level living room to staircase. It also means simple tasks like getting his flask refilled (for milk), or bringing his dirty clothes to the laundry basket are really exercises for me, carrying him on one arm and carting as much as I can up and down the stairs, the whole damn day, up and down… up and down… Just imagine the usual things you do everyday, like bring a laptop from room to living room, or the little things you forget – car key, handphone, book… anything, really… and add a 12-kg baby to one arm and 20 steps to the process.

(Organisation definitely helps and I suspect this is why my memory has taken a hit because all my brain juice is used up multitasking and sorting out what needs to be where at every step of the way just to make my life a little easier!)

The only place I can set him down and then sit and breathe a little, is our bedroom. But I can’t keep him in the room all day so I try to alternate between the two…

Which is probably why I enjoyed our time in the apartment we found on airbnb when we went to Stockholm earlier this year. I could let Matthew wander around (of course, still keeping a close eye on him…) because the house was child-friendly. Our new place has to be child-friendly… it simply has to be!

Anyways. It has been an exceptionally tiring but fun day. Tiring cos of the packing to be done in between taking care of Matthew. Fun because of new observations of Matt.

Like, when I get too engrossed with packing and forget to talk to Matt, he tries to get my attention either by throwing a tantrum or deciding to make a toy out of whatever it is I’m doing. The little guy’s feeling neglected already. And when evening came and I found myself holding him in my arms and him still as active as ever and totally absorbed with his book, my heart just swelled with love.

The kind that makes me catch my breath and acknowledge with certainty that yes, I am happy.

If this is all there is to life, it is enough too.

Day 01 without help. We shall see how it goes.

mmj